I had big plans for this Friday. I was going to come into work and be told by my boss that they were sorry but they were giving me my 60 days notice. The layoff of my dreams. Severance pay, then unemployment and the summer of Melissa would begin. As soon as I was told this news I was going to pretend I was upset. Maybe fake some tears and say I have to take the rest of the day off to "figure things out."
Then I would leave, and as soon as I turned the corner of 17th street I would start dancing and singing like Fraulein Maria. I would run to the train, then run to my house the minute I got off. I would proceed to take a nap (because that is what I do). After this well deserved nap I would get up and go to the computer and look for 25 day long cruises to the Mediterranean. My 60 days would be up just in time for Jacob's summer break to start. The two of us would sail the high seas, eat too much food, vomit a lot from sea sickness (well me, not Jacob he has a stomach of steel) and pretend we are rich by laughing ridiculous at everything we see. I'm looking at you Gyro.
After our summer tour of all things Feta, I would spend the rest of the summer landscaping my backyard and filming some of it for Internet because why not? I could land a show on HGTV. I could be the next star of Backyard Awesomeness. And when I wasn't filming Backyard Awesomeness I would be napping because that is what I do.
Instead though I have not been given my 60 days notice. Which in fact has given me plenty of time to dream of what my Backyard Awesomeness will look like. So I will leave you with an image of the plans I have, don't ask how I'm getting an ocean in my .13 acres of land, you'll just have to watch the show.
30 and semi ragin it,
Melissa
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